I had to get up in front of the whole store at the store meeting and introduce myself. Because the lumber guys sold me out.
We had a store meeting this morning. I sat down with two donuts and then looked up to see Curtis standing next to me and asking if he could sit. I said of course but simultaneously got that little anxiety spike that pops up when I think of things like the permanence of tattoos and someone showing an interest in me. It makes any mutual or possible mutual feelings in me to be voided out under the weight of that anxiety and makes me want to get up and walk away. But I don't and it goes away.
We chat before the meeting starts and even as it is underway a bit...At one point my immediate superior looks back at us, scanning us with her eyes and turns away only to turn back and offer her fist for a bump that I meet with my own without thinking. When I asked why we was fist bumping me, I didn't get a response but that creeping anxiety was like a knock on a door in my mind.
Then the store manager wanted everyone who had never been to a store meeting before to get up in front of the room. I had been to two previous meetings so I didn't even twitch to get up. Curtis started to make fun that I should go and then another lumber associate from across the aisle started to attract attention to me. One of the assistant managers noticed and then it seem like half the store was egging me to get up with the actual legitimately new newbies.
I suppose my turn (third in line) wasn't that traumatic in theory but seeing the beaming faces of the two guys who were just eating up my humiliation made it a cheek burner indeed.
We had a store meeting this morning. I sat down with two donuts and then looked up to see Curtis standing next to me and asking if he could sit. I said of course but simultaneously got that little anxiety spike that pops up when I think of things like the permanence of tattoos and someone showing an interest in me. It makes any mutual or possible mutual feelings in me to be voided out under the weight of that anxiety and makes me want to get up and walk away. But I don't and it goes away.
We chat before the meeting starts and even as it is underway a bit...At one point my immediate superior looks back at us, scanning us with her eyes and turns away only to turn back and offer her fist for a bump that I meet with my own without thinking. When I asked why we was fist bumping me, I didn't get a response but that creeping anxiety was like a knock on a door in my mind.
Then the store manager wanted everyone who had never been to a store meeting before to get up in front of the room. I had been to two previous meetings so I didn't even twitch to get up. Curtis started to make fun that I should go and then another lumber associate from across the aisle started to attract attention to me. One of the assistant managers noticed and then it seem like half the store was egging me to get up with the actual legitimately new newbies.
I suppose my turn (third in line) wasn't that traumatic in theory but seeing the beaming faces of the two guys who were just eating up my humiliation made it a cheek burner indeed.
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