Day 120

Another hellish day that has pushed me to come home and finish my resume and even apply to some places. I really wanted to just quit today, or at least give my two weeks notice, but I wont until I know I have something else. I hope that happens soon.

I finished the second book in the Song of Ice and Fire series. Problem is...I don't have the next book. I requested it from the library and it should get transported to my branch fairly soon, but they aren't open on Friday and Sunday and they closed today at 5 and I got off at 4:45...so no go. Kind of going to go through withdrawl. I went ahead and downloaded the e-book of the next one, but I can't read that at work. Perhaps the new episode tomorrow night will help me through this dark and lonely time. Avoiding spoilers is near impossible at this point.

Doctor Who started off cra-azy! Just finished the second part of the two-part series opener. Damn, it was something. Love River Song, bitch is fierce.

Community is going to be good next week with paintball redux and The Good Wife comes back on Tuesday after that incredible cliff-hangery-yet-not ending the other week or so ago.

That is what I am looking forward to.

Day 119

I must have karmatically fucked myself over yesterday by complaining about the mega-raging moments at work because today was a shitfest of issues, solely with customers being absolute twits. The first hour there a woman got so angry she wanted to call a manager about me and another associate. Apparently she was successful though I haven't heard anything from a manager yet. She was one of those customers who feels entitled to special treatment. There was quite a few of them today.

So now I am suppose to work the next two days, our busiest ones, excited and ready to rock it but I just am not feeling it after today. If I wasn't exhausted and needing to get to bed I would finish my resume and send it off tonight just to feel like I am making moves to get out of there.

After work I went to Nate's place to partake in a little dinner party of homemade Pad Thai (very spicy and yummy) and bread pudding (unreal, so good, dying in happiness). Lily was there and so was Tay, but there wasn't a lot of interaction for as small as a group it was. Part of the reason was because Nate was playing the music too loud to have even a somewhat intimate conversation. Oh well, still was good eats and nice company. 

Day 118

I get irrationally angry at work about a lot of little things. Like how a select few of my male co-workers feels it is necessary to  give me directives like "smile!" when I pass them like I am a doll there for their enjoyment. Today one of the worse at doing this was telling me to slow down as I approached the time clock to clock back in from lunch. I gave him a pointed, bordering on disgusted look (I know this because I was trying really hard to convey my annoyance) and asked why.

"What's the rush?!" he proclaimed, lounging on the couch corner right next to the time clock. I just said that I had to get back on the floor, but that should be a no brainer. Not for these geniuses.

I hate how I keep getting asked about my book while I am reading like I want to stop reading to explain to the five millionth person the basic point of the book I am reading which isn't even possible with a plot as convoluted as the Song of Ice and Fire series. So when asked what I am reading I have been giving the succinct answer "a book" to a varied response.

The "best" one involved this douche face dude who works in Hardware. He called one of the few co-worker gals I actually enjoy talking to a whore simply because he thought something was going on between them and she slept with someone else. Essentially he was living the double standard dream, slut shaming a woman for enjoying sex and going about her business find partners but not even sparing a thought for condemning the male in the equation (even though we work with him as well).

So I already don't want to deal with this dude. That's why when he asked about the book I gave the short answer and when he prodded more I basically ignored him and he got all huffy and said a few inconsequential things before uttering this gem, "So you won't talk to me? Sorry I'm not Curtis!"

I just rolled my eyes and tried to continue reading, but as what he said sunk in I got increasingly pissed and also equally relieved I didn't get immediately riled up by what he said because 1. It would have been what he wanted and 2. It would have got everyone's attention who was in the breakroom and they would have known something was going on between Curtis and I.

I knew Curtis was friends with him but I didn't know he had told him we were hanging out so as that sunk in I felt a bit annoyed with Curtis along with that shit head. Of all the people to have information I don't care to share with everyone, that immature twat-waffle.

Day 117

Continuing:

At that point an asian guy came up behind me and mumbled something about us needing to go inside but he seemed pretty official about it, and I wanted to leave anyway, so I grabbed Nate and Jamie and we went inside. We ran into Maribel and took her with us on the way out the door, now only missing Lily from our original group.

We amassed on the curb outside where we all kind of talked in a round about needing to find Lily until I finally just called her. She was still with her friends but they had left the club and were walking...I guess to their vehicle, I don't know, but when I asked if she wanted to stay with them she said she was heading back to us. Then we just sat on the curb and idle chit-chatted, interrupted once by Lily calling because she couldn't find us. She had somehow got the streets mixed up and was looking for us on the wrong street. She eventually got to us, though by that time everyone from inside the club was out on the street in front of it and it was a crowded mess of messes.

During the sitting around outside bit it when I first met Tay. I didn't see him in the club, but when he just came up and talked to Nate I just assumed it was another random conversation with a stranger. When Tay followed us down the street in our search for a cab, I knew that wasn't the case.

I thought finding a cab wouldn't be hard, and in actuality, we did find one fairly quickly, but they weren't covering downtown like you would think they would be around bar closing times. The six of us approached one van taxi and the driver said he could only hold four legally. There was some hemming and hawing from the boy about that, but we didn't have time to argue and Jamie told Nate and Tay to meet us at Nate's place.

And so we did. Lily left as soon as we got to Nate's place despite my reservations about her soberness, but I felt assured by her blunt Sagittarian-ness when she told me she knew herself and she was okay to drive. I left Nate's about thirty minutes later after he finally arrived. It was apparently difficult for the boys to find another cab to the apartment after we took the van taxi and another couple had taken the regular taxi that had stopped at the same time.

I was a bit buzzed still, but the awesomeness of where I live in the city versus where I work made it a straight shoot home and all was well.

Day116

Continuing:

I then found Lily with a few friends she had been expecting. I was introduced to them but couldn't really partake in the conversation and just stood in what would be a very awkward way normally, but because I was drunk was just somewhat odd looking, like a creepy girl standing on the outskirts of the cool clique listening in and wishing all the while she belonged.

So I finally snapped out of whatever drunk stupor I was in, following Lily and her friends inside because they wanted another drink, but I quickly dislodged from them because the awkward was getting too much with all the people pressing in on me.

I found Nate a little while later who was ecstatic to find me and wanted me to drink more and dance more, more! I was kind of over it, but sipped what I guess was a vodka and tonic (at that point it just tasted like off-flavored water, no joke) and danced half-heartedly until it was time once again to Nate to go outside and try to bum a cigarette from anyone he could find.

When he asked one guy who was sitting in one of the very few chairs on the deck he was propositioned to buy speed and promptly turned us away from the dude. We stood in the middle of a crowd outside and I can't remember how exactly it happened but I must have expressed how over it I was and that I was tired enough that Nate finally relented. Problem was we came as a group of five and there was just Nate, Jamie who walked up shortly after we planted ourselves outside, and myself with our other two members hell-knows-where somewhere in the sea of people.

Nate promised he would go get them and ran off while Jamie and I started some idle chat with the people around us. I was talking to a guy who said he worked for a phone line for battered women or something to that effect. We must have more than that to each other though I don't remember it being all that exciting. However, when he asked if I came to Barbarella often and I said no, I let myself recite how to spell my name and my number as he typed it into his phone. I remember quite vividly thinking as I uttered each number that I could easily replace any one of them with another number, one that would not equal the guy later calling me when I was in a sober state. I didn't do that though.

He didn't seem creepy, but I am waiting for that phone call so I know what number the block.

To be Continued...

Day 115

Continuing the story about my night at Barbarella:

I went outside again to find Nate and see him chatting to this petite girl with those trendy straight-line and low-on-the-brow bangs that all the cool kids have. I honestly can't remember why he disappeared that time but he did and left me alone once again with someone I didn't know.

She was a French student who came over with a study abroad program. We chatted names for a bit. She of course recognized mine and could pronounce it better than I can on a good day, but when I stated that it must be very common in France she actually told me it wasn't. The male form is seen much more often than the feminine so I would be unique even there. Her words. Kind of gave me a little shock and an honest thrill, but now that I have researched her name, Anais, I can see why she would think any other French name would be less common. Anais became popular as a name fairly recently...like in the 80s when I am sure she was born so you can't really shake a stick without hitting one of those "goddesses of love" as the name means.

And boy was what open about the love life. She told me she was in lust with this one bloke he had actually slept with. But that wasn't enough. She knew he only slept with her because she had conviently been there and that it wouldn't happen again. She was also worried about a guy she was waiting to arrive at the club because he fancied her though she found him too straight-laced for her tastes. When he walked outside a few minutes later she said she wanted my opinion and went to get him.

He seemed nice enough, small and bearded like many a fellow in this trendy town and when he walked away I told her as much (really only "he seemed nice" because I really didn't get much of an impression at all). She expressed worry over his height and said niceness, and I wasn't surprised with the latter because she seemed like a girl who didn't particularly like sweet nothings whispered into her ear. Especially when she couldn't get over how attractive she found the bartender because he had tattoos and reminded her of the aforementioned guy of lust. "Tattoo's make me hot". Oh really?

She was an interesting one, for sure.


To be continued... 

Day 114

We drank wine before we went to Barbarella. First it was just me, Nate, and Lily chatting and eating bean burgers Nate made. Then Maribel came in and joined us. Then either Jamie or the gal who ended up giving us a ride to the club, Jal came in. At that point it was getting fairly raucous with Nate and Jamie arguing over when we should leave and us all wanting Jal to come with us despite her needing to wake up early for work. She simply couldn't go, but she was nice enough to give us the ride. And so we went.

The place was fairly empty and that was a-okay by me. We got our drinks and started dancing to the musical selections appropriate for Motown Night. It was all good fun, the club started to fill and we became more inebriated all the while. I noticed this tallish guy with a group of friends but didn't really think much of it until later while Nate was smoking outside the two started chatting and I came up to join in. After some small talk about the guy's hair and how he believed it need to be cut and his name being McQueen, or rather Jason, but because there are so many Jasons he goes by his last night (and while wouldn't he, it's fucking McQueen), Nate straight up asked him if he was gay or straight. And as soon as he said he was straight Nate might as well have disappeared in a puff of smoke for how quickly he left me there with this strange and new dude.

He told me some basic things about himself, job and where he was from, all at my inquiry but after I kind of jokingly asked if he smoked and then equally jokingly made fun of him for doing so, he ran off to the bar for a drink. I stood there for a few minutes...or maybe it was a little under a minute...before I just went back inside. Next time I saw him it was as he was starting what ended up being quite a long dance with Maribel.

To be continued....!

Day 113

Aching body. I knew I was going to be hurting after that crazy river torture, but it has kind of sucked today at work, bending over to scan items and such. Oh and the sleepiness.

I had set my alarm to go off at 7:15 and then 7:30 on the chance I would sleep through the 7:15 one, though I knew I needed to leave the house by 7:30 to be at work by 7:45...I woke up to the 7:30 alarm and had to make a mad dash around my room, throwing on clothes and shoes and out the door. So I pretty much wasn't fully awake while driving and even while talking to some customers once I got to work.

A little more about yesterday:

We got on the river kind of behind schedule. Nate had a friend who wanted us to be there by noon, and she was pretty pissed when we showed up about an hour later. We had to still wait for Nate and I's college pal, Mike, so she went off with her other friend to the river area while we waited...and waited...and not the least bit ironically got annoyed that Mike was taking his sweet time getting there, stopping at a metal shop on the way for hell knows what.

When we found out he had his own kayak and didn't need a tube, we just started off without him. It wasn't fifteen minutes later that he was coming down the river behind us. It was a good thing he had been there because at times (when there was water deep enough to float on) the wind would be strong enough to start pushing us the opposite way down the river and we needed him to pull us in a blobby-chain formation out of rocks and murky banks along the way.

So there was Mike, and Nate who was drinking Tanqueray from a plastic travel water bottle, Lily, Maribel, and Nate and Lilt's friend Tay who we had met the previous night at Barbella as we were leaving. Well, Maribel and Tay were hitting it off in the most nauseating of ways which I was just ignoring, but the other members of the group dubbed them "love turtles" and we all avoided then whenever it got particularly love-turtely on our trek down the river.

Honest, Tay seemed fine when we was sober, but he was making me regret buying all the beers and food that we took with us on the river once he was drunk. He just became obnoxitious, trying to get me to "join the group" when I chose to keep pushing down river instead of just allowing myself to sit in the middle for half an hour with the rest of them, and mentioning me wanting to read as if I would rather be doing that.

When we got back on land, I was tried as hell and just generally over it so I was trying to get us to the car, but the boys were lingering at Mike's car. I sighed out of the earshot before going back to where they were amassed, and Tay starts trying to high five me and say something about how I was joining the group. I let my annoyance show in full force, I was done being nice, and told him to stop but that just got Nate all concerned and then it was both the boys trying to high five me, literally following me for a few paces as I stepped away from them with body language that made it clear I wasn't having it. Not to mention what my mouth said.

I tried to be understanding since they all had drank on the river and I didn't, but it was annoying. I had to drive Nate's vehicle back to Austin but the ride was not so bad once the love turtles in the back fell asleep and I got to listen and sing along with Oh Land while Nate tried to entertain me with jokes.

We ate at Trudy's which wasn't all that bad. Lily seemed annoyed with the place and I could see why after I ate my food. Nothing bad, nothing good. Just not a place that made me want to come back because there was no "hook". No one signature thing that I liked better than anything else I have had in town. But it did the job of feeding me and getting us in and out relatively quickly which got me in bed at home quicker than I had expected.

Day 112

I will elaborate on what happened last night at Barbarella when I am not feeling as exhausted as I do right now. This is the second time I have come home relatively late at night, just wanting to take a shower and go to sleep, and there is one of the housemates already in the shower. Irrational annoyance floods me because they all tend to take morning showers so this shouldn't happen.

So while I am waiting for them to get out, I can write about what happened today it a broad overview, excluding some things that can only be explained by events from the previous night.

Today I woke up at 8:30 with only six hours of sleep. I could have slept more if it were for the sunlight that comes through the very top part of my window. I tried to put my pillow over my face sans mouth since I get claustrophobic feeling very easily, but it didn't work. So I got up feeling a bit queasy, but I knew I wasn't really sick.

However, I knew pretty much everyone from last night was going to be hanging out today and they mentioned tubing the river. I hadn't done that yet despite at least one other invitation to go recently. It is very unlike me to call out sick to work. I tend to go in for a few hours and ask to leave early if anything, but I am just so burned out with the ridiculousness of that place that I don't feel like doing any favors.

So yeah, I did  just call and said I wasn't feeling up to working and they took it for whatever they please, I guess.

The trip itself was okay. Nate was raving about how much fun we had, but for what was suppose to be a three hour relaxing ride down the river, was in actuality a five hour semi-relaxing journey down the river coupled with quite long stretches of getting caught in the rocks and having to nearly cut open your feet to walk your tube across. I should have realized that tubing a river during a drought would not be very wise, but I didn't.

Day 111

Written at approximately 10:00 PM 04/21/11:

Currently sitting at Nate's place surrounded by a group of people I have only met tonight. Good folk. Or maybe I jus think so because I have had what would equate to a few glasses of wine.

We are going to call a cab and go to a club called Babarella's. I thought it was a gay bar but apparently it isjust a club frequented by gay people along with straight people.

There is Jamie, a cool African American from Houston, Lily, a vegetarian high school physics/astronomy tacher from Corpus Christi, Maribel, a special needs teacher from Florida and an old friend of Nate's.

Day 110

I wish I had more than two days off. I don't think I would ever get bored at this point. I have the books to read, the video games to play, the manga to read on the computer, the internet to surf, and then the many, many shows and movies and miniseries to watch. My days off may seem pretty boring to an outside observer, but to me they are chock-full of things to do.


I was headed to the bathroom to have a soak in the bath with the book (no bubbles were available unfortunately) when I thought I saw something on the floor in the living room. I tried to convince myself that it was a blade of grass or a long leaf, but I knew no grass blade of leaf of that shape could be found around here. Instead it was an anole.

She was in her brown state initially (they can change from brown to green and back due to temperature, mood, or background). I just stared at her and she stared at me. I tried to take some pictures but we keep the house dim so they didn't come out well. Then I got the tupper ware out and chased her half-way across the house until I cornered her in the bathroom.

I don't know which of the color changing factors it was, but she changed from brown to green in such a way that I doubted I was even seeing it. I researched all the info about anoles after this incident, so I didn't even know they could change colors, thinking that only chameleons could do so.

I got over the shock and finally caught her, took her outside, took the picture above and then freed her next to one of the trees in the backyard.

Day 109

Sufficiently intoxicated at the moment. Not trying to make a trend of blogging drunk/buzzed but it so happens to be the case at the moment. It was Glee night tonight.

Brie's friends came over, Coco and her husband, Mandy and Jon who are regulars and a couple I met and enjoyed the company of the other week at the birthday party of Brie's friend. We had meatball subs made by Brie, Mandy, and Jon and salad and it was awesome. I was shaking prior to he meal so I decided not the drink.

After Glee and food though came Pictionary and for some reason unknown to me Jon decided it was his mission to see a drink in my hand. Earlier in the evening he wanted to get me a beer and we argued a bit over my general dislike of the stuff, but he went straight for the wine at that point and filled a glass (no stem) to almost the top with white wine. I was a trooper and finished it by the time we all departed after playing the game an hour later. And so now I feel it as I lay in bed in an awkward position typing this and I come to the conclusion I will not be able to read more of the second book in the Song of Fire and Ice books I wanted to read.

I need to finish browsing and fall into a nice and tinglely sleep. And so I shall.

Day 108

I moved to Austin knowing very few people in the city. Of those few I have seen none until the other day at work my college pal Nate came to my register with his boyfriend, Bill. He wanted us to hang out after work. And we did.

He lives literally down the street from my store in these ridiculously expensive yet equally ridiculously nice apartments. We sat on their patio with their two new outside chairs and the one rolling, definitively "inside" chair (they bought for the two of them only, not for guests). Gin and tonics were had, cheese stuffed crust pizza was eaten and music, movies and books were shared.

When we were properly lubricated, I gave a great unabridged account of the Nonrelationship Saga to much arguing about the other party's motives due to Nate being sure all men think the same way. It was interesting to hash it out to someone who hadn't heard it before while in this city where we both live. Not that there is any indication that we are only a handful of miles from one another versus hours, states, or oceans away.

I ended up dreaming about it that night though I can't remember the details. I know it was unsatisfying, to stay true to the reality, I suppose. 

Day 107

I got my hair cut the other day. I get it cut only once a year and the past four years it has been cut by one man in Arlington. I was prepared to drive up there to get it cut by him again, but I figured that wouldn't be very practical in the long run, he tends to cut away the length it grows in a year, and I need to see what other styles are out there.

I researched through naturallycurly.com salons and stylists that others liked in the area and chose one from a salon downtown. I probably shouldn't have done that. Location should be an indication of price, but I figured since I only cut my hair once a year a little expense wont be anything to worry about.

Well...though she was very nice and listened to what I had to say, she seems to cut very little from my hair before we went to the sinks for a wash. I made sure to look at the floor as we walked away and very little of my hair was on it. But I don't know for sure how it is going to look that point, and she says she may cut some more once we style it. Didn't happen. I mean, I like how it looks, but very little has happened and when I ended up having to pay $100 dollars for what really ended up being a trim that is going to grow out into a triangle/christmas tree head in a few months, it is really hard to not think it was a waste.

Part of it is my fault for not saying anything when she showed it to me after styling, but I was thinking she knew what she was doing, she is a professional and really ballsy for not cutting more just to cut, but really going with what looks good. But I honestly think I've had better cuts for half that price from my old guy in Arlington.

When she said goodbye she said she hoped she saved me a trip to Arlington, and in my temporary satisfied, ignorant-of-the-price-of-the-cut state I expressed that she had. I can't really say that now after a few days of it. I found a split end, several really meaning she didn't cut every section of my hair, I didn't have that "oh, my hair was cut and feels sooooo short" experience in the shower, none of the usual stuff. No one even noticed it was cut.

But one pro. It will actually be long this time next year and I can see it at a length it has never been before.


On an unrelated note - I went to take a shower tonight and saw this:



My housemates are hardcore, no hygiene activity is going to deter them from their drinking.

Day 106

It's going to be a relief when I press "PUBLISH POST" because I am so tired/buzzed right now that getting a good amount of words here is going to be an accomplishment.  I actually have plenty to write about but not the mind to structure it and make it flow in any way shape or form.

I can say about the haircut I had a few days ago...that it cost 100 dollars for her to cut very little from my hair. So it is still long. Some bits were brought up a bit. And then she used quite a few products (curly-girl friendly though they were) and styled my hair to a mussy, crazy tease that was cool but not how I would normally do my hair. So now, a few days after the cut, I am able to see how it looks with my own products and you can hardly tell I had it cut. No one at work mentioned anything and Kristie only mentioned it because she saw it when it was styled the day it got done. So essentially in a few months it is going to be all one length again but I wont get it cut until next year. It will be cool though to see it actually long for once since all the length I have grown in the past year wasn't cut off.

I can also mention that I got free food today because I let someone borrow a book. How awesome is that? I finished A Game of Thrones and let a guy a work have it and he bought me two breakfast tacos that filled me up a good length of the day. I was happy.

Now the other things I need to write involve using thought processes aside from basic emotional reactions so I will write in length about them through the course of the next few days. Now..."PUBLISH POST"!

Day 105

Earlier in the week I kind of made loose plans with Curtis to hang out again Friday (today). But yesterday I was starting to regret it because...well I just get that feeling where I don't want to have to dedicate my time to any one thing or person and that was what I was feeling. I woke up today and pretty much felt the same, plus I wanted to finish A Game of Thrones tonight so I could be ready for the show on Sunday and pass on the book to one of the guys at work.

So when Curtis called I ignored it. Then an hour or so later he sent a text. At first I ignored it, choosing to continue reading, but then decided I could at least say I wasn't in the mood to hang out. You know, not be a total bitch.

I text back that I was planning on finishing the book so I've been reading the whole day and that was why I took so long to get back to him. He asked if I would have time to fit in a sushi dinner with him...and surprising to myself, I said sure.

I was being a right little shit about it though, kind of low energy when he picked me up all the way to the restaurant. I would tell stories as he asked questions, but I didn't find myself wanting to inquire much and as the drive went on there were lapses of silence. I don't mind silence, but the contrast from our last drive was a bit extreme.

But as we sat down at the bar and chose some roles to share between us, we started to hit our natural flow and by the time we left I felt pretty good about hanging out with him. Partly because he allowed me to pay this time like I wanted. After the massive expense of the last outing, I don't foresee letting him pay for much for a while.

He invited me to go inner-tubing (is that what it is called?) with him and his buddy/roommate of a sort later in the week but I don't know what I think of that yet.

Day 104

I remembered what happened yesterday that I wanted to write about.

I was cashiering and a woman came up on her cell phone. This happens and I just scan the barcodes silently and wait for them to pay. Sometimes the person wants me to tell them the total amount but I don't offer it until they stop yapping and ask me verbally. So the woman stays on the phone all the while rummaging in her purse for money. When she finds the bill she wants to use she still rummages around in her purse, though, so at this point I am staring at the developing line but I figure she is looking for change.

But it wasn't change. She pulls out a pen and writes on the bill before giving it to me. I take it and finish her transction (remaining silent all the while as she is still too busy to acknowledge me since she is on the phone and all) and then I check out the other people in the line before I open the drawer and look at the bill. It said "Choose Jesus Christ".

I suspected it would read something like that. I debated for a while the motives behind my impulse to cross out the sentence. Was I against the message? Yes, for myself, but that doesn't mean it would be a bad message for others.What ultimately got me was the fact that a woman supposedly wanting to spread the word of her god was too busy to actually engage another person for a few moments while checking out but could be bothered to hold up a line to passively write a message on a piece of tender. What I don't like is when people can't see the big picture.

Day 103

I was hungry today. Like, really hungry. And I know it was my own fault because I woke up and pretty much immediately started reading A Game of Thrones until twenty minutes before I needed to clock in at work, only eatting a Nutty Bar. The book is getting ridiculous. Good that is.

Something happened today that I feel like at the time I was planning on writing about it here, but at the currently time I can't remember what it was at all. So maybe it wasn't all that cool. It had to be something that happened at work, and I know it wasn't exciting at all today. Just the normal people watching spectacle that it usually is.

I didn't get to leave until almost thirty minutes after my scheduled (actually I was scheduled a 10 hour shift, a mistake I'm sure as that would have resulted in a 42 hour week) time. The problem with that was that I wanted to get a snow cone on the way home from Casey's and they close at 9. So my ten-minutes-til clock out was really pushing it. I jogged out of the store and started to sprint a bit to my car in the parking lot but had to wait foot-tappingly long for the light before I was able to park by the stand and be the last customer. Black cherry/cinnamon with cream. Yes.

Day 102

I went to a birthday party last night for one of Brie's friends, Daniel. I had never met him or a lot of the other people there but it was at a local pub and was pretty casual. The pub, called Dog and Duck was fashioned in the style of a UK pub and had a pretty delicious plate of Fish and Chips that I shared with Brie. Ran bought me a beer in lieu of no hard liquor. Even thought it was the most fruity, less beer-y beer on the menu, it was still beer. And when I ended up tipping it over like an A-class tool a few minutes after getting it I wasn't very disappointed.

I clicked with a couple who came to the party. The female got hooked on Oh Land by the same Alamo Drafthouse preview I saw as well. Her boyfriend and I thought have a lot of common in terms of television tastes and the three of us plus on of the regulars on our Glee nights, Coco, talked about such obscure things like the Dyltov Pass Incident. The couple hadn't heard about it so Coco and I filled them in with our fragmented memories about it plus wikipedia entry look up via one-barring cell phone (mine).

The birthday cake featured a picture of the birthday boy when he was three years old peaking out from the rim of a bucket that was fashioned on his head. Very cute. It was yummy too, vanilla and chocolate cake. I surprised myself by getting a chocolate piece and was aching by the last bite.

Day 101

I woke up to a volley of hail at five this morning. I laid in the darkness for a few minutes while my sleepy brain jolted to attention as I thought about my car, a second later letting that thought flow back into the background with the knowledge that I was able to park under the canopy. Still my mind did not fall back into sleep. So I got up with just my t-shirt on, pulled it down to cover my naked ass and walked to the bathroom.

I saw the door that leads to Ran and Kristie's bedroom was open and Ran was sitting up in bed looking out the window. I didn't linger as I was literally holding down my modesty and creeped to the bathroom.



I was throwing something in the garbage can as I was leaving for work at seven thirty this morning and catch the unmistakable scent of honeysuckle. I turned around to find its source as it smelled strong enough to be right next to me, and found that it was just behind me, hanging off the car port and looking dew covered and beautiful. I took a few with me on the drive and pinched the little drops of nectar from them with fond childhood remembrance.

Day 100

Day 100. What a round number in this list of days. Though it was a fairly dull day, to be honest.

Being in the break room at the same time as Curtis is...just...awkward for some reason. I find myself putting on a bit of a show, or perhaps I am just more aware of what I am saying and doing and to whom. I don't know what is up with that.

It is easy to get frustrated with this job, with the coworkers, with the customers. And I do. But I don't take it home with me. I am not feeling that pressing urge to get out of the situation job wise though, or I would think I would be scheduling in time to work on my resume instead of plotting out one hour allotments for Dragon Age II playing and 100 page a day requirements for A Game of Thrones reading. I am not so worry because I know when I do feel that weight pressing on me I will be very quick at working my way to any goal I set out. It's just that right now I want to enjoy myself on my off hours, so that is what I am indulging.

Day 99

I looked kind of beat up. Today was my first weekend day cashiering garden while it is in full swing spring mode. Two days ago I scraped the shit out of my left ring finger middle knuckle by getting it stuck between the lower shelf and a role of paper towels as I went from a bent over to standing position. It bent backwards to the point that I thought I may have broke it so while it was still numb-ish I took of the ring I wear on that finger in case it was going to swell. Luckily, it was just the skin loss. I keep forgetting about the lack of skin though and put my hand into my pocket or run it across something pointy and hurt inducing.

Then yesterday I stood up on my bed and was taking off my robe, completely forgetting I had the fan on and smacked my elbow mighty fierce. Like...it broke the skin and the little scab has a bruise aura now.

After today in garden though, when everything is about how efficient and fast you can be, I apparently went at it full throttle. I have scratches on my arms from plants. I'm sure mainly rose bush thorns. I wouldn't be paying them the least bit of attention if it wasn't for those other, self stupidity inflicted injuries.

Day 98

Day off!

Getting to sleep in was glorious. And for once I didn't wake up early out of habit and actually slept until almost 9 o'clock. Relaxation was short-lived after I looked up how much it was going to cost to fix the windshield on my car and then it was an hour or so of talking to my mother about making a claim, talking to the insurance to make a claim, and talking to the company who is going to replace it.

And then Curtis called and we planned to go out for the night for dinner and a movie. And so we did.

We hit up Kerby Lane and I got to confirm what I already suspected: religious (not overly so) and conservative (may be overly so though he doesn't like Palin at least). But even so, I had a good time chatting with him and subsequently getting lost on the way to the movies for a while. He would apologize for it later, but getting to drive around was even fun.

When we did get to a theater, we picked the one at the Domain. Not a good idea. First off, you walk in and it is like a ritzy bar. Then when I said we wanted two tickets the girl asked if we had reservations and then explain that since we didnt, and weren't part of their crazy ass club, each ticket was legit 29 dollars per person!  I just had to look up how much it was because when she said it I must have blacked out. I was so ready to walk away. I wanted to pay since Curtis paid for the meal (against my wishes, but I figured I would get the movie and it would be fairly balanced). He just popped out his card like it was nothing though and on we went.

I made a joke once we were in their amazingly comfortable lounge seats that the price must have been for spending the night there, as if the seats were our bed and the screening room a massive hotel room. Only way that expense would be worth it. Not to mention the oddness of the type of movie we were seeing, an off-color comedy heavy on the "bro-humour" with these professional looking waiters, and menus, and cloth napkins, and women in heels, and wine. Bizarre.

It was an experience.

Day 97

Clean sheets. It is a nice feeling after running around like crazy for, what it must have been weeks now. I haven't had an actual "sit-down" day off for a while, so tomorrow will be good.

I am getting really pumped for Game of Thrones now. I watched a half-hour "Making Of" and while it gave a few things away I hadn't gotten to yet, it was really cool to see the characters I have been reading about. Seems like they have  good cast and the sets look fabulous.

I am going to bed hungry because I spent what must have been an hour talking to Ran about a myriad of topics and then had to shower by which time it was 10:30. I will not eat that late for anything. So I should go to bed soon so that the ache doesn't get worse. Shouldn't be hard to do.

Day 96

I made it! I succeeded in not falling asleep on my three hour drive back to Austin. It was a struggle, the first half oddly harder than the last half. I had to actually slap myself at one point. My eyes were blurring due to the contrast of light to dark and, oh yeah, fatigue. But I made it!

The game was awesome solely because they won and I therefore won as a jinx upon my name has been lifted...perhaps?

But joy over said win was short lived as I soon discovered a long crack in the windshield of my brand freaking new car. Not cool.

On a definitely more cool note, I got to spend time with not just one, not just two, but three siblings. It was a lolarious event full of unintentional funnies ("Want to see my junk?" "Uh...not really..." "I want to see your junk!") and an open closet filled with game, all for the taking. I only picked one though, The Witcher. I should get to that eventually.

Day 95

How lazy I am:

I have a wooden ledge over my bed that I put lotions, hair ties, tissues and such. When I need something from the ledge, instead of sitting up, I use a magnify mirror (also on the ledge) to see what I want and grab it.


I am trying to read Game of Thrones before it premiers. I don't think I am going to make it. But the book is good and I am excited for the show if it can do it any kind of justice. I have been avoiding posts about the show as not to spoil anything for myself so I don't know what to expect.


Going to a baseball game with my brother tomorrow. Another day that will include a good bit of driving; my little Aoko is getting in some miles on her. Gas is ridiculous, but I am lucky I have some money to spend.

Day 94

When I open up this page a look at the cursor blinking at me, ready for me to type something, I tend to think I have nothing to write about today. Then as I fall asleep or while idly thinking later the next day, I realize the little things I observed or felt.

Like when I was on the back of my brother's bike and he drove past his mother's house, explaining that she lived so close yet never came to see them anymore. Or when I bought his two daughters parasols that the wanted at the fair and the little one kept on saying thank you for them, hours, and even a day after the fact.

There are other moments I am forgetting because I always write this when I am tired a eager to go to sleep. I need to figure out a better way to do this so I accomplish what I planned to create when I started this challenge. Good, truthful, straight from the thought-brain stream of consciousness.

Day 93

I woke up in Edmond, Oklahoma. I am about to fall asleep in Austin, Texas. A traveling day it was.

I knew when my father said we would be eating breakfast with my brother and his family that it meant we would be getting on the road later in the day. I knew this so when they mentioned they wanted to watch the ballgame after breakfast and I had the option to head back with the other members of our party who do not think watching baseball games are that much fun, I decided to stay.

It was worth it. I will say that, as tired as I am. We left Edmond at 4, got to my hometown around 6:30 and I was on the road again before 7. And now here at 11:30. I knocked off about a half hour by...testing the speed limit. That was also worth it.

I may get to go to a ballgame this week with my brother which would be awesome! Even if I have to drive a while once again. Thanks to my sister grabbing a car charger for my phone, drives aren't nearly as painful as they could be.

Day 92

Written 4/2/11 at approximately 11:30 PM:

Robin Hood: Men in Tights is on the television in the hotel. Not a more apt movie could be playing after a day at the Med Fair.

It was a fairly mild day in terms of excitement, but I was able to acquire a nice carnelian point as well as a nother point that the lady selling said was a agate, but I will have to research that one.

I didn't even funnel cake it up because once I ate midday, I was so full it was painful to walk around the rest of the time at the fair.


I got to ride on a motorcycle for the first time tonight. My brother has his own bike and took me for a ride around the block so to speak It was quite lovely, the weather a refreshing cool, the stars visible above. I noticed one of the streets we turned on was called Gemini and my beaming smile did not falter. In fact, a lyrical working of words came to mind though they seem to escape me now.

Day 91

A driving day. Woke up in Austin and laid in bed through the morning before starting off the journey to Fort Worth. By the time I got to the city I was starving and stopped by Braum's to indulge in a gluttony that has enabled me to skip dinner at its greatness.

I parked at mom's house and saw my dogs for a hot second while eating and dropping some fresh tunes on my sister's computer. Then it was off again to my hometown, a shorter, more enjoyable trip due to endless music and cruise control.

While driving I thought about guys. All the guys that are affecting my life, warranted or not. The further I drove away from Austin and my life there, the less I could relate to my feelings for Curtis. I more I thought of the likelihood that I was working a distraction. At the same time, I feel a pang of denial as well. Not sure which is real.